This is very very interesting. I had a twitter presence for 6 years with a modest amount of followers, and I felt more and more like I couldn't really share what I wanted because I felt compelled to *stay the same*. I actually do share a lot of what people would consider vulnerable things about myself, but in the vein of improving & moving forward. And so many of the people in the groups I'd been apart of online were dedicated to their cause in such a way it became their identity. I had a number of people say that by moving forward in my life & finding new ways to manage & live my life that I was in fact "victim blaming" (myself) and running away from seeing justice be done to the perpetrators who were really at fault. I've been untangling from this in many ways. I still believe there's value in being open & honest & vulnerable - but not at the risk of never moving beyond our circumstances.
Loved reading this! As someone who was never on social media until about a year ago I struggle with it. I always see the people who are sharing deeply personal stories getting tons of engagement. And personally, I don’t really want anyone to know me that well. I’m definitely going to read more about audience capture.
To be fair, if you wrote “I’m feeling really anxious today” in a post and someone responded “You should consider eating more fruits and vegetables,” or “Have you tried speaking with a therapist?” that would seem super rude and condescending. It’s hard to provide genuine, productive responses to a stranger on social media, so at least sending a small message of support and validation seems like a safe kindness. I’m glad you’ve found a way to step away, but just feels a bit unfair to blame “the audience.” Expecting to get your healing from a tool like Instagram seems unrealistic, like trying to use a pair of pliers when you really need a hammer.
Thank you for sharing this! A tendency I noticed is that women, a lot more often than men, are encouraged to "share vulnerabilities" online and be on emotional display whenever posting to social media. I find this tendency rather odd and off-putting.
So, when I started Earthly Fortunes, I actively decided to make the newsletter *NOT* about me, and have emphasized the theme several times. IMO, personal stories can serve as portals to ideas, but our ideas should always take precedence over our personal stories.
You expressed a big part of what freaks me out about the internet as someone who was not a very online person before last year and is still struggling with existing online.
Good thing you caught it in time! Important to be aware of it and take steps to prevent / correct. Loved the 3 reminders also, very practical and useful. Thank you for writing about this!
Holy crap, audience capture is a downright chilling term and even more chilling effect. I'm so grateful you put this forward and shared your first-hand experience of this phenomenon. I've had questions myself about levels of vulnerability online and this advice feels particularly useful and sound.
Thanks for sharing! Definitely needed to hear this 😅
This is very very interesting. I had a twitter presence for 6 years with a modest amount of followers, and I felt more and more like I couldn't really share what I wanted because I felt compelled to *stay the same*. I actually do share a lot of what people would consider vulnerable things about myself, but in the vein of improving & moving forward. And so many of the people in the groups I'd been apart of online were dedicated to their cause in such a way it became their identity. I had a number of people say that by moving forward in my life & finding new ways to manage & live my life that I was in fact "victim blaming" (myself) and running away from seeing justice be done to the perpetrators who were really at fault. I've been untangling from this in many ways. I still believe there's value in being open & honest & vulnerable - but not at the risk of never moving beyond our circumstances.
Loved reading this! As someone who was never on social media until about a year ago I struggle with it. I always see the people who are sharing deeply personal stories getting tons of engagement. And personally, I don’t really want anyone to know me that well. I’m definitely going to read more about audience capture.
To be fair, if you wrote “I’m feeling really anxious today” in a post and someone responded “You should consider eating more fruits and vegetables,” or “Have you tried speaking with a therapist?” that would seem super rude and condescending. It’s hard to provide genuine, productive responses to a stranger on social media, so at least sending a small message of support and validation seems like a safe kindness. I’m glad you’ve found a way to step away, but just feels a bit unfair to blame “the audience.” Expecting to get your healing from a tool like Instagram seems unrealistic, like trying to use a pair of pliers when you really need a hammer.
Thank you for sharing this! A tendency I noticed is that women, a lot more often than men, are encouraged to "share vulnerabilities" online and be on emotional display whenever posting to social media. I find this tendency rather odd and off-putting.
So, when I started Earthly Fortunes, I actively decided to make the newsletter *NOT* about me, and have emphasized the theme several times. IMO, personal stories can serve as portals to ideas, but our ideas should always take precedence over our personal stories.
You expressed a big part of what freaks me out about the internet as someone who was not a very online person before last year and is still struggling with existing online.
This story is ✨frightening✨ 😅
Good thing you caught it in time! Important to be aware of it and take steps to prevent / correct. Loved the 3 reminders also, very practical and useful. Thank you for writing about this!
Holy crap, audience capture is a downright chilling term and even more chilling effect. I'm so grateful you put this forward and shared your first-hand experience of this phenomenon. I've had questions myself about levels of vulnerability online and this advice feels particularly useful and sound.