The Way of Water: Turning Retreat into Victory
Part 2 of 5 of a series on elemental realms
A crisis looms. An overbooked schedule. Conflicts at home. A life-changing decision.
Life's challenges can be so overwhelming sometimes that we break down. Frozen, we can't possibly deal with it — so the problem continues. The situation that we must face persists, killing us slowly until we are one day crushed by it.
I share the Five Elemental Realms because it reveals the countless ways we can navigate life using our own skills and strengths. Water is one of those ways.
A Taoist master wrote, "Nothing under Heaven is as soft and yielding as water. Yet in attacking the firm and strong, nothing is better than water." (Alfred Huang, I Ching)
Water takes the shape of whatever contains it. It surrenders, but it isn't weak. It adapts without resistance, yet it can crash down violently in waves. By examining the properties of water, we can learn how to retreat, assess, and make powerful comebacks.
The Path from Earth to Water
In my last article I explained that when a novice warrior begins training, she first encounters the realm of Earth. Earth is raw and unrefined. It is the last-ditch effort you make when you didn’t see the attack coming. When you’re caught off guard, you hunker down because you don’t yet have the skill to avoid it.
Water is the next stage. At this point, the warrior has enough training to recognize an attack before it lands. Instead of hurriedly bracing for impact, she can now afford the time to take a step back. The creation of distance buys her even more valuable time.
The Archetype of Water: The Scientist
The archetype of Water is the Scientist. Faced with the unknown, the scientist steps back, observes, and gathers information before taking action. Their choices are precise, measured, and based on understanding—not impulse.
Likewise, in budo, a warrior embodying Water will retreat at the time of an attack. The intermediate warrior can see the attack coming and counters it while moving back. She then waits to see if another attack is heading her way. She retreats again, continuously drawing out the opponent — until she is ready to strike. When the distance is perfect and the timing is right, she crashes down with devastating force.
Like a scientist, this warrior took the time to back away and study the situation. She understood more about her opponent. She created the time and space needed to mount a successful counteroffensive.
Using the Water Method in Everyday Problem-Solving
Instead of getting overwhelmed and running away, our budding warrior has been training diligently in the realms of Earth and Water. She now has two approaches in her arsenal for tackling problems of any nature:
Earth response: Stand your ground. Refuse to budge when a bully bothers you. Blurt out a truth that needs to be said, even if feelings are hurt. Demand better conditions or quit the job you hate.
Water response: See the situation forming and flow with it. Step back when a bully punches you — and kick him when he thinks he is winning. Have a proactive conversation with a family member before someone gets angry. Negotiate a pay raise at work.
Options allow you to have control in any challenge.
They also relieve the pressure of feeling like there’s only one solution. There is never just one right answer when it comes to working on ourselves and building better lives.
The only true measure of success—whether in combat or in life’s toughest problems—is efficacy.
Did your solution work? Great. You succeeded. If it didn’t? No big deal. Take what you learned and try again. Could there have been a better way? Probably! But instead of beating yourself up for not getting it perfect, table that knowledge for next time and move forward.
What I learned in the dojo is that physical attacks are not so different from the challenges we face in life. Combat is a compressed microcosm of existence itself. A punch can come from an opponent in an alley—or from life itself, striking when you least expect it. Unlike what I was taught in school or church, budo didn’t teach me to have all the right answers—it taught me the many ways of responding.
So the next time you feel backed into a corner, remember: You are not stuck. You have options: Earth, and Water.
The Water method is simple: Step back, observe, and prepare. Buy yourself time, but don’t disengage. Then, like a crashing wave, act with clarity and conviction.
In my next article, I will talk about the third elemental realm: Fire. This one’s spicy!
…the water method…wave at your problems…